Monday, June 24, 2013

Cultivate


Today a Sister I know shared this status on Facebook from Joyce Meyer Ministries:

“The Enemy doesn't fear us going to church every week.

He fears us having a close and powerful relationship with God.”

I could have shouted across the house.  I know this may seem like a simple statement and one I have heard many times; but it unlocked a part of my brain that must have been asleep. 

I have been going through something for a while and it had reached the point to where today I had told the Lord that “I can’t go on one more day like this.  I know that we go through the fire; but I think this one is burning me up”.  I asked the Lord for some help…then I clicked on Facebook this morning.  When I read her status I realized that the enemy’s biggest accomplishment with me right now was getting me to forget about my relationship with the Lord.  I don’t mean that I have completely forgotten; but I forgot to cultivate it.  What do I mean by that?  Well…if He can plant seeds of doubt in your mind…about your relationship with the Lord…about your security…about your worth…about any of these things…he’s got you.  If He can get you to break down the communication between you and the Lord then He has found a way in.  If he can get you to listen to him just enough to get a toe in the door.  I was still reading my Bible everyday…I still prayed; but what was missing was the depth.  There was something between me and the Lord…

As I thought about the Facebook post I thought…more than anything I need to keep that relationship between me and the Lord protected.  I need to make sure that if there is anything between me and the Lord that it is taken care of so that the lines of communication are open.  I need to realize that no matter what happens in life as long as my relationship with the Lord doesn’t change or waiver that we can weather any storm…trial…hiccup in the road together.  Instead of trusting the Lord…praising the Lord…leaning on the Lord…I had been worrying and doubting…and placing all those weights on my own shoulders instead of His.  I have failed to trust in His love and care for me.  Shame on me.  Lord forgive me.  After all He’s done for me.  He’s never failed me yet…why should I think He would start now.  He knows where and who I am and the foundation I am built on is firm.  He sees all my frustrations and just when the pot I’m in goes to boiling He knows how to keep me there till I’m cooked all the way through!!  Lord touch my mind and help to remember you’re there and I am not alone.  You know EXACTLY what you’re doing at every moment.  Thank you Lord!!!

So, where do we go from here? 

Time to have a little talk with Jesus…and learn how to dwell in 2nd Heaven as Bro. Wright talked about this weekend. 

Saturday, June 15, 2013

Conversations with my Daughter

Today on the way home from the store…the kids were whining…I was hot…we all were just done for the day.  I told them to both be quiet because I had enough.  Little Bit #2 speaks up from the back…

“Mommy…I just don’t feel like you really like me anymore”.  She’s 4.  I asked her what had made her feel like that and she said that when I count she just doesn’t think I like her very much…because if I really liked her I would not punish her.  I of course told her that I will always like her.  I may not like what she’s doing or how she is acting; but I would always like her!!  

I told her that the reason mommies and daddies have to correct their children is so that they learn how to behave the right way.  That way they don’t just go around being mean and unkind to everyone they meet.  She said “Oh…I just don’t know how to very good”. 

I told her yes you do and that she was a very good little girl; but sometimes she just had some rough days.  I told her that’s what mommy was for…to help her learn.  :0)

As I sat here thinking about it I thought…isn’t that just like us.  The second the Lord begins to correct an area in our life we begin to doubt His love for us.  Because if He really loved us He wouldn’t make us go through things right? 

WRONG.  He is trying to correct our character so that when we go out in the world we will portray His ways and treat everyone the way we should.  His love for us is so great that He will not allow us to just go on the way we are.  He wants us…pleads with us…and yes directs us to change. 

He loves us too much to leave us the way we are.  Thank you Lord for loving me :0)

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Learning to Soar


“Wherever I am I’ll praise Him

Whenever I can I’ll praise Him,

For His love surrounds me like the sea.

Praise the name of Jesus.

Lift up the name of Jesus,

For the name of Jesus lifted me.”

I was sitting in church a weekend or so ago.  I was having a really hard time.  I had a lot going on in my head…a lot going on around me…the Lord was dealing with me...my kids had suddenly decided to go nuts…I was so frustrated and then Luvanna got on the piano and began to sing this song.  I thought to myself well where I am is right here.  In the middle of confusion…frustration…aggravation…hurt…hopelessness…all these emotions I was feeling…this is WHERE I AM.  I thought well, this is not my ideal location spiritually…I am not on the mountain top; but even here…whatever this place I’m in is called He still deserves me to praise Him.  He still is good even when I am not.  He still loves me when I am unloveable. He still cares about me when I fail to care for others.  He is STILL my Savior and still deserves whatever I can give Him.  Even if all I have to offer Him at that moment is tears and brokenness…He still deserves whatever I have.  Even if what I have is nothing…He can take that and make it something.  The more she sang the better I felt.  Did things change…no; but instead of letting those things pile on top of my shoulders I started climbing on top of them and using them to push me little bit higher.

I was thinking last night of an eagle and how we’ve always heard that it uses the storms to soar above the winds.  I was thinking how that there have been times in my life where I have felt myself soaring…and I mean SOARING above the things around me.  Where things would happen and I would just say ok Lord…I know you’ve got this under control and up up up I would go.  Other times it seems like I would struggle and struggle to get off the ground.  I don’t think the difference was just the weight of the circumstances; but maybe more likely my willingness to let Him have control…to allow myself to be carried up higher by the winds surrounding me and instead me being afraid to jump off the cliff and consequently getting hammered instead by the rain.  Lord help me to have enough faith and trust in you to jump off the cliff and learn to soar instead of choosing to get pummeled over and over by the rain.       

“Wherever I am I’ll praise Him

Whenever I can I’ll praise Him,

For His love surrounds me like the sea.

Praise the name of Jesus.

Lift up the name of Jesus,

For the name of Jesus lifted me.”